Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep

So here I am again, sharing one of my favorite portraits of my family… I recently became a volunteer for Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep, and I had the opportunity to shadow an infant bereavement session last evening.  NILMDTS is a world-wide organization that provides professional portraits for families who have suffered the loss of an infant, and although I have never experienced that kind of loss, I can only imagine the pain and grief that a family suffers.  This is such a great way for me to give back, a way to honor and remember the beautiful children, to share the spirits of their short lives.  Photographs are obviously so important to me, and I know that I would cherish these images forever, and I am so grateful to be able to give that to families in need.

Prior to photographing a session on my own, I am required to do a little training and shadowing.  I was just approved as a volunteer over the Christmas holiday, and I contacted another amazing photographer in my area to let her know I would like to shadow her on a session.  I got a call last night as I was leaving work that she was headed to the hospital.  Oh boy… we were walking into a session where a 2 month old with interrupted SIDS was going to be possibly taken off life support.  I immediately started crying in the car, wondering how in the world I was going to witness the pain and grief and loss this family was facing.  After arriving at the hospital and praying with my collegue, I gathered myself and we headed up.  I can’t explain the experience, but it is one I will never forget.  The parents had chosen to keep their little boy with them for a little longer, so I simply watched as Amy captured him with his parents, grandparents, and baby cousin.  We were able to stay and photograph his baptism, and while it was one of the most difficult things I’ve witnessed, I know that this family will be forever blessed by the portraits that NILMDTS provides. 

So I sit here this morning, wondering what occured over night, wondering if their little boy is still here, or if he has gone ahead to the Heavenly Father, and I hold my children a little tighter, hug them a little longer, and have just a little more patience, because right now, they are here with me and I couldn’t imagine it any other way.